Sorry I’m Late. I’ll be there in 15.

Chatter Commencing.

Everyone is late. Everyone needs to cancel. Here are some quick texting excuses to use next time you are in a bind, and need a little extra time.

> I’m held up at the grocery store. They are training this hot cashier, so I’m stuck in a slow line. I’ll be there in 15.

> Yo, I just stopped and helped this dude jump his car. Karma points for me today! I’ll be there in 15.

> I had to slam on my breaks to avoid this idiot on a bike, and my coffee spilled on me. Gotta zip home quick. I’ll be there in 15.

> There is an elephant in the middle of the road. I’ll be there in 15.elephant

> I dropped my phone in the toilet and had to dry the crap out of it. Gotta buy some rice. I’ll be there in 15.

> Dude, the traffic is insane. There is a stoppage at the corner of random ave and no chance blvd. I’ll be there in 15.

> My mom just called, and I had to talk about life things. I don’t know what’s going on in my life, how do I get that across to her? Oh well. End of rant. I’ll be there in 15.

> Finally. Stupid bus driver had to stop at McDonalds. It’s like, come on, you’re overweight already. Anywho, I’ll be there in 15.

> The line at Starbucks is so freeaaaking long! Seriously, does this dude really need to get his whole office lattes? Kiss ass much?! I’ll be there in 15.

> Yo, I am stuck behind this train. It’s at 89 cars already and I can’t see the end. I’ll be there in 15.

> Holy crap. I just saw this dude get hit by a car on his bike by this Asian chick. Then the chick drove off. I gotta stay and talk to the police. I’ll be there in 15.

> I am dropping my roommate off at work because her bike tire is flat. I’ll be there in 15.

> (If rainy) Over by my place, there was a break in the clouds and a sweet rainbow. Sorry, I’ll be there in 15.

> I got sucked in to the live version of Freebird at the Atlanta concert in 82. You gotta hear it. I’ll be there in 15.

> Some dude just walked in and yelled Free Pizza! I’ll be there in 15.

> (For Girls) I was out of the shower and the power went off with my wet hair. I’ll be there in 15.

> (Meeting someone after work) My boss called me into his office to chat about my recent performance. Another reason to have that drink. I’ll be there in 15.

> I can not find a place to park! This city is obnoxious. I’m circling around again. I’ll be there in 15.

> To keep this brief, my two roommates just ate Cocoa Puffs with expired milk. The projectile vomiting was a sight to behold. I’ll be there in 15.

> You just missed the red bull girls! So smoking, and I got her number. You could’ve chatted up the friend! Missing out. Anyway, I’ll be there in 15.

> Sorry, but the funeral scene for Aragog was on ABC Family, and I had to stay to watch Radcliffe do the pincers thing. I’ll be there in 15.

> Sorry I’m late but there was this mama duck and her baby ducks, and they were crossing the street, and I just had to snapchat that shit. I’ll be there in 15.

Now, not all of these will work for you, but in a bind, I’m sure one of these bad boys could get you through without hurting the feelings of that waiting friend!

Closing Chatter.

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Categories: An Eclectic of the Eccentric, Thought Catalog-Esque | Tags: , , , , , | Leave a comment

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