Monthly Archives: December 2013

Six Words You Need to Know

Chatter Commencing.

Obviously I’m a writer. I have a blog. I am currently putting words onto the page. I’m definitely don’t have logolepsy, but I am a big supporter of the written word. And because of this, I have a bit of a word fetish. Certain words, when dropped into a conversation, make me pause and glance at the speaker with a coy smile. Bonus points are thrown about wildly.

Okay, so maybe I’m getting a little too far ahead of myself with all the glory and bonus points. But seriously, some of these bad boys are like little orgasmic bursts when you read them in a sentence. Anywho, check them out!


Tzuris, (noun) – a very aggragated and woeful feeling of sadnessElla sat feeling nothing but tzuris, silently tearing apart the bouquet of flowers she’d received from John the night before they broke up. Not only is tzuris a beautiful sounding word, but it’s also exquisitely formed. Bonus? It is a sneaky good play for scrabble, because the rest of the letters are pretty darn common.

Wifty, (adj.) – a form of flaky that describes a person who always thinks that the grass is greener at the other party. Brian is a wifty fuck. He was with me all night until Barney suggested foxy boxing, and then bam, gone. This word is a favorite because it’s definitive of my personality. I’m always bouncing around locations, especially when drinking, and I’ve often been classified as wifty by my friends.

Eccentric, (adj.) – the interesting combination of craziness and intelligence that makes you stop and think, hmmm, that’s strange. He’s an eccentric young chap with all of his customized gizmos and gadgets. Well, you’ll see what I mean when you meet him. I don’t think I need to explain why this word is amazing. Like wifty and a couple other words on this list, it’s a primary describer of my personality, and for that reason, I love it.

Ineffable, (adj.) – indescribable with words. Sometimes I see a woman, and even I, the writer of writers, stand in awe at the ineffable wonder. As a word that contradicts itself, it is a natural favorite. I’m a big fan of playing devil’s advocate, and for me this word is the devil’s advocate of words. It is also quite useful, because one typically busts it out when there no other words come to mind.

Quixotic, (adj.) – overly idealistic in the face of troubling life situations. Mom, I know I’m being quixotic, but I will eventually find a job that pays well, challenges me, and makes me happy. I’ve always lived as a quixotic soul, and the above sentence was more than just an example. It’s a fact. I will find that awesome job, and I won’t stop being idealistic about my expectations.

Callipygous, (adj.) – having a beautifully shaped tush. My hometown bff Jen is undeniably sexy; mostly because she’s the most callipygous woman I’ve ever laid eyes on. As an ass man (like Mr. Tribiani) I am drawn to this word. It is as wondrously constructed as the booties it describes.

Anyway, I love words. As I discover other new gems, I’ll try to let y’all know.

Closing Chatter.

Categories: Books & Writing, Me Myself & I, That's Life | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Twelve Books I’m Reading at 24.

Chatter Commencing.

One of my goals for this year was to finish a book a month. I used to read all the time, but in college, it slipped away as I was constantly reading for classes, and wanted nothing to do with more words. I’m getting back into it, and as a goal, I’m going to finish a book a month.

Only the Innocent, Rachel Abbott. ~ First book of the year was actually a book I started before my birthday, but had been reading for several months. I was trying to figure out what was happening, and honestly, I only read a chapter at a time. The book is a realistic thriller surrounding the death of the great philanthropist, Hugo Fletcher, which follows a pair of thrilling protagonists. Tom Douglas is a detective, and powerful and aggressive team knows from the get go that the killer is a woman. The other piece centers around Laura Fletcher, the wife of the famed deceased. The thriller touches on some very sensitive topics, and I wouldn’t suggest it to a younger audience. But if you want a thrilling roller coaster ride that illuminates a difficult situation, give it a gander. It’s easy to find on Amazon.

Marked, Kim Richardson. ~ For my November book, I went with the first of a fantasy series. Marked is the first novel in the “Soul Guardians” series, a free book for Kindles right now. For me, a fantasy series needs to hook me early. This one did that. The snarky, klutzy but fierce protagonist, 16-year-old Kara Nightingale, is rushing to the most important meeting of her young life when she’s whisked away to a new land. She teams up with a cliched male lead to battle demons, described quite grotesquely. Honestly, was a tad startling at first. Anyway, as the first of a longer series, Kara learns quite a bit throughout the novel, ultimately surviving a battle with several Higher Demons. If you’re looking for a new fantasy ride, this might be the path. IF you’re hesitant, wait until I release information about the second book, Elemental, which I plan on devouring over the holiday season, cozied up by the fire.

Other Books to Read this Year…

I am just starting An unEnchanted Fairy Tale, so I can’t let you know about it yet. It has started strongly, with an average girl, saving the life of the BMOC. But he’s mysterious, and she’s scared… That’s all I know so far. Needless to say, my interest has been piqued.

First, I want to read Matthew Berry‘s book, Fantasy LifeI love his podcast with Nate RavitzPod Vader, and Stephania Bell. It’s got a lot of insightful fantasy football advice, as well as fun humor, and has led me to playoff births in all 3 leagues and a pair of first round byes. In general, I really feel for Pod, who like me, is constantly mocked but always rises up against it with a perfectly timed Groin Drop. However, I would love nothing more than to crush him in next year’s Man’s League. P.S. I love that the 06010 loves Taylor Swift.

Several books that have been suggested and are considered for the remaining  months are:  Donna Tartt ~ The Secret History; Christopher Hitchens ~  Letters to a Young Contrarian; Tina Fey’s best seller, Bossypantsand the F. Scott Fitzgerald classic, The Great Gatsby.

Fey’s book is probably tops of that list. I also want to read Colbert’s book. But both of those are things I’d love to listen to instead.

Anyway. If you read this whole thing.. you’re definitely a Hermione.

Closing Chatter.

Categories: Books & Writing | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Can You Date If …

Chatter Commencing.

I’ve dated my fair share of people. flowerFor the most part, they all started in generally the same fashion. I met the girl. We flirted. I got her number. We went out. If we hit it off, we continued dating. I would guess that most people have experienced this general relationship path before. However, there are a variety of situations that arise where, like a flower growing in the sidewalk, a relationship grows in an unlikely place. Each must be handled delicately. But if you keep your manners and communicate, you can build a lasting foundation, even on the slipperiest of slopes. So, without any more delay, I’d like to present my favorite game, Can you date if  __ ??? Let’s dive in boys and girls. Remember, I’m writing from my POV, so feel free to replace pronouns with your personal favorites, and also remember that this is generalized for mass consumption.

As a way of shedding light, I’m also going to be using some good old Friends references to explain certain situations.

Can you date if … she’s your friend’s sister?

This is one of the most over-used examples in television. Ross originally is distraught at the idea of Chandler and Monica dating, but comes around after they tell him it’s not just “fooling around.” The morale of Ross’ reaction is simple. If you’re going to date a friend’s sister, you gotta let him know ahead of time and/or that it’s more than just a fling. If you really like her, and she you, there should be no issue. Although, I highly suggest keeping the snogging to a minimum in front of him. (P.S. If anyone could draw the image of Ron nodding his head in approval of Harry & Ginny’s Kiss (Book Version), in say, 3 short comic pages, I would love you to death).

Can you date if … you work together?

I detail this particular issue in my “Company Ink” article, but I will say it again here. NO. Do not do it. It’s very tempting. It seems like the best idea. It sucks. The aftermath of an office romance creates crazy drama that no one really wants to deal with. So save yourself the time. Avoid the work fling.

On the other hand… the office fling is one of the hottest you’ll experience. The constant work flirt gets you revved up all day long, and when the end of the day rolls around, all hell breaks loose. My final conclusion? If it’s Elisha Cuthbert, I think the juice would be worth the squeeze.

Can you date if … she is 4 years younger than you? GG

I picked a random number here. I figured it didn’t matter where I started, but simply the rule I’ve learned and followed over the last half decade. It’s a little different than the commonly thought of Age/2 +7, I choose instead to add 9. Thus, when you start at 18, you can date another 18 year old. It keeps things a little tighter on the higher end, as well. Everyone has their own standards, but for example, if you’re 24, and you want to date some, she should be 21 (12+9).

Honestly though, if you really like the person, you can work past age. It really is just a pair of numbers. And remember, “Your age doesn’t define your maturity.”

Can you date if … she’s dated one of your friends?

Yes. With only one condition. Ask First. Seriously, it’s the easiest thing in the world. I’ve actually been asked before. They asked me together, saying that they were interested in hanging out, but didn’t want it to be weird. I said it was totally fine, and they dated for several years. However, I’ve seen the same type of situation blow up. After my buddy Matt broke up with his on again/off again girlfriend, his roommate Craig, started dating the same girl. Craig was trying to find the right way of telling Matt, but unfortunately, word got back to Matt via other sources, and the two guys had a major falling out. The two are still not friends to this day. It is very sad. They were like two peas in a pod. So, ask and then enjoy.

Can you date if … she’s dated more than one of your friends?

This is an interesting example. And if you’re involved in a tight group of mixed friends, the odds are that over the years, you’ll be intimate with different ones. For example, the friends crew has had mixed histories. Every single “Friend” has kissed every other friend, and a variety of them fooled around together. It’s inevitable. So if you think she’s worth your time, and you both feel that way, go for it.

Can you date if … she’s the town bicycle?

Of course. Aren’t all men the town bicycle, willing to give anyone a ride? Just because she can and does take advantage of that same thing, doesn’t mean anything. More power to her.

Can you date if … she met you while still dating her old boyfriend?

This is by far the hardest one for me to write about, because it happens more often than you think. See the Matt/Craig situation. The aforementioned female and Craig never hooked up before the relationship with Matt was over, but because it happened so quickly, it left Craig a bit nervous about her ability to commit. Their relationship was constantly strained and eventually it broke off.

The media has always said that, once a cheater, always a cheater. It is about will and mental fortitude. If she gave in to you when she was weak, what will stop her from giving in to someone else when the two of you are experiencing minor turbulence? Tread lightly on this one. That’s all I must say.

Last one.

Can you date if … you were best friends? Yes. Yes, a million times yes. The road upblocks for this one are pretty obvious. You both need to be single. You both need to be ready for someone. And you both need to find the other attractive. But the tricky part of this relationship is starting it. It’s very high risk, very high reward, and for some people it’s too risky. However, if you can get the timing right, you’re likely never to date again.

Now, my situations have been generalized, so please don’t barrage me saying that your situation is different and that I’m an idiot. Love works in really weird ways, so if you’re with someone wonderful, forget about how you met and focus on how that person makes you feel when you’re together.

Unless it’s your sister.

Closing Chatter.

Categories: An Eclectic of the Eccentric, Love & Relationships, Thought Catalog-Esque | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

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